Cash Problems

23 Sep , 2014  

I have too much cash in my wallet and it hurts my butt when I sit. #FML #FWP

Golf Problems

23 Sep , 2014  

Won a sales campaign at work and was awarded a day off to play golf with my director.  Already had the day scheduled off to play golf elsewhere #FirstWorldProblems #FWP

Jamaica Problems Man

23 Sep , 2014  

Can’t decide whether to stay oceanfront at an all-inclusive resort or 9 mins away with a group of friends while vacationing in Jamaica! #FirstWorldProblems

Corner Office

23 Sep , 2014  

The sunlight in my corner office causes glare on my computer screen. I have to close the blinds. #FWP

My Friend Doesn’t Have An iPhone

12 Aug , 2014  

My friend doesn’t have an iPhone so I couldn’t text him from my macbook

3D Movie

11 Aug , 2014  

I had to watch a 3D movie because I didn’t want to wait for the 2D showtime.

In Flight Movie

9 Aug , 2014  

My in flight movie was longer than my flight


9 Aug , 2014  

I have no place to put my leftovers from dinner because I have too much food in my fridge.

Pooping Problems

9 Aug , 2014  

I want to take a shit but the maid is cleaning the bathroom.


9 Aug , 2014  

I just spent $300 on groceries, opened my fridge and didn’t feel like eating any of it…

Work Coffee

9 Aug , 2014  

The free coffee at work sucks

My 8 Year Old

19 Jun , 2014  

My 8 year old wants to submit on FWP but left her iPad mini in the van, so now I have to do it.

My girlfriend wants to have sex

18 May , 2014  

My girlfriend wants to have sex but I just jerked off 15 minutes ago.

Damn iPhone

14 May , 2014  

Uggggh! I just got the iPhone 5s and they just announced the release of the 6 next month! Now I have to go back to Verizon and wait in line again #FML


12 May , 2014  

My Wifi just went down for 1 hour….FML  #FirstWorldProblems #FWP

My Tommy John’s

12 May , 2014  

Picture 65

I hate wearing underwear unless it’s my Tommy John’s…and I get pissed off when I have to wear other underwear because I only do laundry once a month. #FWP #FirstWorldProblems

Stupid Global Warming

9 May , 2014  

My Poodle can’t get a haircut today because of the humidity outside…ugh, so annoyed with stupid global warming! #FirstWorldProblems #FWP

Starbucks Problems

9 May , 2014  

Picture 62

#Starbucks #StarbucksProblems #FWP #FirstWorldProblems

Starbucks Problems

9 May , 2014  

Ordered a Tall, but got a Small…I don’t understand! #Starbucks #StarbucksProblems #FWP #FirstWorldProblems

Fountain is SO LOUD

8 May , 2014  

Picture 61

Ugh, how can I sleep when the fountain outside my window is so loud! #FirstWorldProblems #FWP

Damn Pillows!

8 May , 2014  

I can’t decide what Pillow type to get because I sleep in all sorts of different positions. #FirstWorldProblems #FWP

My Pants

3 May , 2014  

My fat pants are now just pants.

Sleeping in

28 Apr , 2014  

The one day I try to sleep in, my maid wakes me up.

I Want To Quit My Job

24 Apr , 2014  

I hate my job, but I make to much money to justify finding a new one.

I Reset My Password

23 Apr , 2014  

I changed my email password and now I have to re-enter it individually into my desktop mail app, iPad, and iPhone

No Food

22 Apr , 2014  

I’m hungry… but not for any of the food in my house.


10 Apr , 2014  

My masseuse is busy this Thursday. I’ll have to wait till Tuesday.

Costa Rican Vacations

3 Apr , 2014  

I’m annoyed that my family only takes vacations to Costa Rica since we bought a house there.

Chips and Dip

2 Apr , 2014  

I have too much chips for my dip, but if I open more dip, I’ll have too much dip for my chips.

Wife Gave Me A Chrome Cast

31 Mar , 2014  

Wife bought me a Google Chrome Cast, now I have more HDMI devices than I have HDMI inputs.

Can’t Find My Pants

26 Mar , 2014  

I can’t find my favorite pair of pants. They must be in my closet in my second home.

My pool is cold

25 Mar , 2014  

My Home Owners Association won’t heat the pool enough to use it on windy days.

Heated Seats

25 Mar , 2014  

My Mercedes has heated seats but doesn’t have a heated steering wheel and it was really really cold yesterday.

My Dishwasher

24 Mar , 2014  

My dishwasher doesn’t clean my champagne glasses very well because her hands are too big.

My Kids Are Using All The TVs

24 Mar , 2014  

My oldest son is watching the 50-inch TV; my youngest son is playing Xbox on the 45-inch TV; and my daughter is watching a Blu-ray on the 40-inch TV; so I have to watch my TV show on the 10-inch iPad.

Dropped my iPhone

24 Mar , 2014  

My iPhone fell out of my pocket and cracked my iPad.

Skipped My Favorite Song

24 Mar , 2014  

I accidentally clicked the “thumbs down” button in Pandora instead of “thumbs up” so I skipped one of my favorite songs.